A Return to the Third Floor and Noise in Indonesia

The roof is almost finished with the exception of some work on the railings, my bedroom on the third floor is almost back to normal although I have to re-varnish all the closet doors as they are speckled with paint. Even though the roof is supposed to be just the roof and not a hang-out place, it looks like it is going to be a popular hang-out place with the immediate family and other relatives in the neighborhood.

Besides having the roof almost done, moving back to the third floor has been the highlight of the past six weeks. Indonesians have a great tolerance for noise; they love making noise and they can put up with an amazingly diverse array of pops, bangs, shouts, screams, roars, and tinny calls to prayer. As an old Westerner, I’m happy with a relatively quiet environment. During my six weeks in exile from the third floor, I lived in the family room on the second floor. I found that sitting out on the second floor balcony having a cigarette was almost the same as sitting out in front of the house in terms of noise pollution. I became familiar with life on the street. This kampung is full of kids of all ages. Now that mine are almost all teens and wired, they spend a lot of their time online with friends, but when they were younger they lived on the street in front of the house playing with friends until I’d call them in for bed. Not unlike my behavior many decades earlier in Chicago. They learned to be able to tolerate loud noises for long periods of time. My kids, just like every other Indonesian that I know, can fall asleep in the noisiest of places: at family gatherings, in the middle of crowded ferries, sitting in airport departure lounges. For them, as for my wife, they have a difficult time understanding my need for quiet. So now that I am back on the third floor, there is enough distance between me and the street to dampen a lot of the noise, and the fourth floor is positively peaceful.

The issue of noise and foreigners arose partly because of my temporary life above the street but also because this is the month of Ramadan and prayer calls, Qur’an readings and kids messing around blast out of the loudspeakers of mosques around the archipelago. One of the latest stories on this issue is the saga surrounding an old foreigner living in Lombok who has been accused of entering a mosque and turning off the loudspeakers. He denies this action and the police and allegedly the villagers claim that he did this and is thus responsible for the bedlam that followed when the villagers went on a rampage and destroyed the contents of his house. This story will continue to play out for a while, but things don’t look good for the American regardless of his guilt or innocence.

This incident has brought out the usual idiotic remarks by some foreigners and Indonesians. Foreigners love parading their fantasies of shooting out mosque loudspeakers and complaining bitterly about the intolerance of Muslims, Indonesians or Islam. Indonesians love using the “if you don’t like it go home, this is our country” card. As far as I’m concerned the five prayer calls a day and the use of the mosque loudspeakers for community announcements is fine (I’d like the mosque elders to turn down the volume, but the uselessness of that goes back to Indonesian’s love of noise), but the protracted readings of the Qur’an and the use of the loudspeakers by kids is far beyond reasonable. As far as going home, that’s just such a lame argument that no one with any sense pays attention to it anymore.

The result most likely to come out of all this fuss is a continuation of the status quo. The American will either have some cash and buy his way back into grace or he will be deported. The mosques will continue to blast prayers and messages throughout the day and foreigners will continue to whine and complain. That’s Indonesia.

Family Vacation in Singapore

Well we did it. We made our first overseas family trip in 12 years. In my last post I mentioned the worries that I had about immigration issues with the kids who are dual citizens. We had no problems on that front. The kids went through one line for Indonesian citizens with their mother, while I went through another for foreigners. The kids slid through without a problem, and I had a very friendly, young immigration official who joked about the kids and my wife. It was one of the most pleasant experiences that I’ve had exiting the country. We had the early morning Air Asia flight out to Singapore which meant getting up at 12:30 am to shower and finish last minute packing. The drive down to Denpasar was lovely as there was no traffic, and I just comfortably drove down to my brother-in-law’s house. We woke him up, and he drove us to the airport.

In a lot of ways, this trip was similar to the school excursions that I’ve been on over the past twenty years. Keeping track of visas, filling out forms, keeping everyone together until we made it to the departure gate.

Arriving in Singapore was something that I wanted to experience through the eyes of my children. The kids haven’t been to Singapore in years and Changi has evolved since then. The kids took it all in and breezed through immigration and customs. We grabbed two taxis to the hotel. This offered me the opportunity to see what I had been waiting to see: the kids’ first impressions of Singapore. Not surprisingly, it was the cleanliness of the city and the size of the buildings that drew their first comments. “No trash anywhere.” “Everything is so big.” “How are they so rich and we’re so poor.”

Over four days, we did as many tourist things as we could: the Merlion, the Flyer, the Singapore Zoo, the Night Safari, shopping on Orchard Road, the Aquarium. Off time in the pool at the hotel. Lots of walking. The kids picked up the rhythm of Singaporean English which they mimicked on the plane flight home. They had the opportunity to see some of the richest parts of the city and some of the working neighborhoods although we didn’t have time to make it to Chinatown or Little India.

Lots of questions and the inevitable comparisons with Bali, Indonesia and Singapore. It was a reality check that I wanted them to have. They’ve adopted this unfortunate view of the United States as being the land of milk and honey. Easy living if you get there. Why would I live in Indonesia? Can they move there and be rich? My teacher says everyone has a Mercedes.

My anthropological perspective colors everything that I see, how I think, what I do. The kids respond in the way that they were trained. Unfortunately part of that is blaming Indonesia’s situation on everyone else: the Dutch, the Chinese, the Christians, the foreigners. It’s an easy out for a country that has an educational system that doesn’t encourage critical thinking. As a teacher, I know that I can lecture, preach and teach but students only really get the lesson when they experience it for themselves, whether it’s solving quadratic equations or comparing social systems.

Questions: Why are all those women Indonesians (about maids out on Orchard Road on a Sunday?), Why don’t people just walk across the street (without waiting for the light to change)? How do they make buildings so big? Why is that woman’s skirt so short? Why does everyone speak English?

So, we’re back. I’m still processing the information from the trip. The kids remember the zoo, the shopping, the restaurants. We’ll see if they remember the other stuff.

Birthdays and Expat Families

This week we celebrated another family birthday. Son Number 2 turned 14. Because I made a deal with the children to forgo large birthday parties in return for a family vacation to Singapore this year, we had a family only dinner for Sam. My wife made the cake and all the food as usual. And, for once, I enjoyed a party without all the preparations that the massive birthday parties in the past have required.

Spaghetti seems to be the favorite birthday food – maybe because it’s somewhat similar to Indonesian meals, but with an exotic (for Indonesians) touch. I took a count of family members at the party and came up with 19. That’s 19 family members that live within a block of our house. This is a large family.

So things went off well: everyone had a good meal, and I saved a little money. Next birthday is my wife’s in a few weeks. I’m not sure what we’ll do for that, but I’d better figure it out quick.

When the Indonesian Wife is Away, the Expat Husband Will…

do what?

Expats with Indonesian wives have to deal with ceremonies, family responsibilities, community and religious obligations and the miscellaneous demands on time and resources that, at times, can drive us to distraction. In my family, all of the above are liable to be in play at any one time. My wife and Daughter #1 just returned from a three day trip to Surabaya as part of my daughter’s pursuit of gaining acceptance into a university that will allow her to reach her goal of building a profession in the health services. So, the two of them went off to Surabaya for a university entrance exam. That left me, the expat husband, free for three days. Or, was I free? Actually, that left me with three of the kids, along with a monkey and a cat, to care for.

Occasionally I check the search terms for this blog and some interesting search words come up. Taking a look at them, I wonder what the searcher was thinking of when s/he put them into Google. Without detailing the terms, some of them lead me to think that there are a lot of wanabee expat guys who think that we, the expat guys, live the fantasy life of relaxing on a tropical beach with a lovely semi-dressed young Indonesian woman catering to all our needs and desires. In fact, nothing could be farther from the truth – at least in my case.

So what did I do during those three days without my wife in the house? Got up every morning to get the kids ready for school, organized breakfast and made sure they had their school work, backpacks, snacks and some treat money. Once they were off to school, it was time to do the dishes, feed the animals, mop the floors and then kick back for a few hours to read emails and write an article or two. When the kids came home, it was time to make sure they had some lunch and were set for the afternoon. Then time to plan dinner, defrost some meat, prepare vegetables, make rice, chop up spices and finally feed the three of them as the sun set for another day.

I enjoyed doing all this – it’s the reason that I quit working, to spend some time with the family after being focused on a job for twenty years – but it’s far from the fantasies of the guy sitting in the UK, the US or Europe in some dingy flat with a nowhere job. The reality for me, and I think many of us who live here, is that paradise is just another place to work out our lives, raise our kids, and deal with the mundane affairs of life. Of course, there are the sunsets…

Magic in Bali?

Magic in Bali has been a source of fascination for foreigners since the days of Dutch colonialism. Many visitors to Bali have been introduced to the subject through Miguel Covarrubias’ book, Island of Bali, published in 1937. Foreign residents of the island tend to be somewhat reticient about publically talking about magic or witchcraft lest they be considered non compos mentis. However, from time to time, the issue surfaces and is somewhat gingerly discussed.

Personally, I tend to be a skeptic being trained in the Western scientific tradition, although I remember once sitting in a graduate seminar at Berkeley and listening to an African anthropologist tell us not to be too quick to discount local beliefs in magic. So, while skeptical, I work on keeping on open mind, after all, that’s what science is supposed to be about. Where is this leading?

Last night, we had one of those strange occurrences that are usually attributed to magic at work. I was up watching one of my favorite tv shows, Bones (a forensic anthropologist working with the FBI), when my son burst into my room to notify me that there was a huge snake downstairs. I followed Sam downstairs and heard shouts and screams coming up from the kitchen on the first floor. The kitchen was crowed with my immediate family and my sister-in-law’s family that live in the adjoining house. Two neighbors were out in the small courtyard that serves as a garden and has a small outdoor kitchen that my wife uses for grilling food. The neighbors, armed with bamboo poles and a broom, were trying to flush the snake out from behind my wife’s small two-burner stove.

They finally got it out from behind the stove, and I had a chance to see it. (My family had locked the kitchen door so that I couldn’t get out to assist in the capture or killing of the snake.) My wife said that it was an ular sendok (also known as a cobra here – scientific name naja sputatrix). It was a nice specimen, just over a meter and considering all the beating with bamboo poles and the broom, quite placid in behavior. I finally got out of the house by going around through the front door so that I could see the creature close up, but by that time it was dead. I ran off to get my camera, but by the time I made it back downstairs, the snake and the guys who killed it were gone.

On to the magic part of the story which came this morning at breakfast with Daughter no. 1 and my wife. The two of them were having a rapid discussion about the snake and its meaning. I had to slow them down a bit so I could get the whole story, but just as I guessed last night after the snake incident, the appearance of the snake was being attributed to magic. How? Lots of ways according to the local sources; the way being something of a guessing game until consulting with a dukun or kyai. The why is what interests me usually in these matters. In this case, it may be related to two things according to my wife and some other local sources. One, a recently divorced woman has found some interest in me – most likely because I’m perceived as wealthy, it can’t be my looks at 61- and my wife is clearly in the way of her desires. Thus, the snake. Supporting this is that the snake was found in one of my wife’s favorite cooking spots, and was waiting for her at the kitchen door when she opened it to get something out of the kitchen. My wife slammed the door before it could strike, although it was raised and ready to attack, unusual for cobras which generally only attack when bothered. The second reason is only peripherally related to me: that is iri hati, or envy. This is related to us being perceived as the wealthiest family in the neighborhood – quite probably true as this is a very poor kampung. The snake is supposed to, in this instance, not kill my wife, but introduce marital discord. The symbolism of the snake in this situation being similar to snake symbolism found in several monotheistic religions. However, snakes are symbolic of bravery, strength and wisdom in other cultures and religions (just saying as I like snakes and don’t want to give the impression that they are universally related to evil and cunning).

So, next come the countermeasures. My wife rushed off this morning to get five kilos of salt. I have to watch the countermeasure stage closely as I want to see how this all works out.

As for believing that mr. cobra showed up as the messenger of bad magic, I told my eldest daughter that if another one appears in the next few days, I’ll be that much closer to believing the magic explanation for his appearance.

Bali always has something interesting to offer just when I was thinking that retirement was going to be a one sedate lifestyle.